Just Another Manic Monday

Hi everyone

I hope your Monday has been a lot better than mine has. Well, I say that, my Monday was ok, rather stressful and very frustrating but I have come to realise - and I wish that I did this more often - that no matter how frustrated or anxious we get, the situation or circumstance will still have the same outcome because we have no control over it. The same way that we have no control over what people may say or think about us and yet we seem to let it ignite something within us that can make us feel insignificant or overwhelmed or just plain pants. I don't like that feeling and when it creeps up on me, and it still does, sometimes, just sometimes, I can see it happening before I sink too deeply into myself and into that dark place that no one should ever have to be in.

If you have to think of your favorite battle scene in a movie and how everyone in that scene are covered in blood and fighting hard to make sure that their side is brought to justice or safety, that's what anxiety is like for me and probably so many others. I fight my demons every. single. day. It's hard but there are also these amazing moments in my life that I am so grateful to have. When the demons take over, it doesn't mean that I've fallen out of love with my husband or don't want to look after my animals, it's just that I don't want those things for me. I give up on me, not them. But how do you look after and love those you care about so much if you don't do the same for yourself? This is something I have to work on all the time and at the moment, it's tough.

So as I sit with my cup of tea and type this post, I'm thinking about the billion things that I should be getting done, the ones that have to be done, the ones that I probably should get done and the ones that I'd like to get done. For me, I think a list is a good thing to make and to start at the top and work my way down. That way I'm breaking it down into smaller chunks that hopefully won't overwhelm me to the point I can't see the wood for the trees because when that happens, I don't do anything.

Just remember to take a deep breath, put your big girl/boy pants on and smile because no matter how bad you feel, there is more than likely someone else out there who is worse off than you are (another thing I need to remind myself of).

I hope that this post has made those who need it know that they are not alone because you're not alone.

Until next time, keep smiling :)

Hugs

Janene